His Hauntings
by Damn-Well-Sure-To-Avenge
Summary: Natasha said he shouldn't do that to himself, but here he was, hacking S.H.I.E.L.D's files to find the names of the people he had killed. The agents, the bystanders and everyone else he worked to protect. All dead, all gone. And all because of him.


**His Hauntings.**

Hi there! This is my first Avengers fic and I'm sorry if this is OOC, The only thing I know about Marvel is from brief info (wiki) and the movie. I apologize in advance for anything wrong :)

Disclaimer: I don't think anyone on this site actually owns anything but their obsessions... So no, I don't own Avengers.

They all now crash at Stark Tower. I don't care xD

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Natasha said he shouldn't do that to himself, but here he was, hacking SHIELD's files to find the names of the people he had killed. The agents, the bystanders and everyone else he worked to protect. All dead, all gone. And all because of him.

The fight for the Earth with Loki was about a month ago, and Clint had to give credit to the fast workers and a sweaty Stark who rebuilt STARK Tower so quickly. All the floors were built, even for Natasha and Clint who were in and out due to missions. But it was nice at least, and he felt safer with the top-notch security.

But the month that followed had allowed a month of sleepless nights, tossing and turning and pacing up and down the halls silently as memories came back to him. Small glimpses of simple things from his brain-washing time with Loki, things like an arrow into a guard's neck, receiving orders from Loki and most recently; sending an arrow into the Hellicarrier.

The only brief information Fury had told him was that the flying ship had been assaulted, the Hulk was released and Loki became free. But that was it. No _hows _or casualties listed.

And thus, Clint immediately knew he was part of it. The _looks_ he was given by some agents weren't looks of gratitude. More along the lines of disgust.

He sank to the bottom of the wall in the hallway, a hand running through his hair. He had to know what he had done, or it would completely consume his mind. And he didn't need a foggy mind, _especially_ out in missions.

But wouldn't the names of those he had killed consume his mind too? He pushed that thought back. He could worry about that later. Right now, answers were the only things he wanted.

His footsteps were silent -as expected from a master assassin- as he stood, walking to the elevator. The amount of floors in the building felt like a constant challenge, as he constantly had to remember which floors belonged to whom. It was 10:48 according to the digital projected numbers on the elevator, and he watched as the floors went past. He was waiting for the top floor where he knew Tony and Pepper would be doing the love-dovey thing, but his questions required answers tonight because he honestly didn't know if he could handle another night without them.

The doors opened and he stepped out, instantly seeing Tony and Pepper turn their heads as they held up their drinks.

"Ah, Clint!" Pepper stood up from her stool, smiling.

"Miss Potts," Clint greeted, and Tony grumbled something about 'damn hawks' before putting on a big classic Stark smile.

"Uh, I'm pretty sure you're getting his name confused with Legolas," Tony inquired, standing next to Pepper.

Clint ignored it, "Sorry to interrupt Pepper, but I sort of need Stark for a second."

Tony raised an eyebrow, "Who doesn't?" He cheekily replied, and Pepper rolled her eyes and nudged him, "He's all yours. Bring him back before Eleven thirty or he'll get grumpy," She laughed as he pouted.

"Because I'm away from you!" He protested, but was setting his drink down and looking at Clint expectantly. Clint just shrugged, "I need some answers."

He could basically see the gears inside Tony's mind working, and Clint almost sighed, but began walking back to the elevator with Tony reluctantly following.

"So… which floor is your hacking floor?" Clint asked, standing with his arms folded in the elevator.

"Every floor," Tony shrugged, but pressed a button. "So I believe Fury hasn't told you then?" Tony asked, and Clint almost bitterly laughed, "When does he tell us anything? He only does if his hand is forced."

"That's true, Artemis,"

"Can you stop with the names?"  
"What names? They are your names right?" Clint resisted the urge to use his blue glowing arc reactor as a target.

The doors opened once again and they stepped out, and Clint felt like a little child standing with all the technology around him. The lights in the room automatically switched on- as did all the computers or projectors or whatever the heck they were. Tony stepped around, knowing exactly where to go. Clint followed silently and watched as Tony stand in front of one big screen, blue words scrolling across the projected screen.

"How many?" Clint asked finally as Tony swiped across the screen. Tony's hand froze before he swiped a few times again, but finally answered. "Not too many…" Clint frowned as Tony hesitated, "Phil."

Oh god no. Oh god. He knew Coulson had gone missing, but he didn't dare ask. But now here he was, hearing the death of a friend.

And god, his hands were stained with red, red, red. Which was also expected from a master assassin… But his friends… those who he _worked_ to protect? It wasn't right. It was wrong, wrong, wrong.

He ran a hand through his hair again, evening out his breathing as his heart seemed to freeze. He nodded eventually, and Tony expanded the screen by spreading his palms out and multiple other screens appeared as they played footage.

And he noticed it was footage of the main room when he had sent that arrow at the ship, the reports flying in about the engines going down. He frowned, and then saw an arrow fly across another screen, lodging itself in the system. That's when the video cut out and he turned to Tony, "You used an arrow, it seems, that cut out our footage and maintenance. Sparkle Stars and I had to go out and repair some engines. Hulk was released shortly after and Loki soon followed." Tony said.

"I remember it," Clint said slowly, testing the words out. Yes, he could remember. But this wasn't from his memories from his dreams or anything else. It was like he had suddenly been plugged in and videos were streaming into him. "They're… foggy, but… I remember shooting that arrow."

Tony just looked at him, the gears turning again in his brain. Clint just turned his attention to another screen before it minimized back into the one screen.

"I guess that explains some things…" He hesitantly said, but it wasn't true.

"But not everything," Stark pointed out and Clint nodded. "What about Coulson? H- How did he go down?"

"Loki. Not you, Loki. He was set free and the damn guy went in and thought… No, he didn't think. He just went in without backup and got himself killed." Stark shook his head slowly.

"Who freed Loki?" Clint tested out. Was it him?

"Himself. And decided to replace his brother for it. Not the greatest trade, but hey, the guy's now probably getting what he deserves." Tony shrugged then checked a screen. "I believe Miss Pots will be rather lonely. I'm off to save the damsel in distress," He grinned, commanding Jarvis to shut off the computers. The lights remained on and Clint snickered, "Yeah, I'm sure she's _very _lonely living in her twelve-percent-of-hers Tower. Oh yeah Stark, she told me," He winked at the slightly baffled Stark, who muttered a 'damn hawks' as he watched Clint walk confidently to the elevator.

The damn guy shot down onto his floor and Tony had to wait until it came back up. Sure, he could override it so that it could come back up instantly, but he let the damn hawk take the victory.

Clint, though, didn't feel the slight bit victorious. He sat on his bed, face in his hands as he fought off the edges of sleep.

But the answers he received tonight just weren't enough, and he knew he'd be sleepless.

Well, thank god he had seen the password of Tony's which allowed him to hack files.

Yeah, he wasn't called 'Hawkeye' for nothing.

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Yay! Finally typed! This came out so damn different to what I hoped, and I haven't bothered proof-reading. So I don't know what to think of this. But I would be glad if thoughts (no flames please!) could be sent :)

I apologize if he's OOC, I really am. As I said, not familiar with Marvel as much as DC (Sadly). Hope you enjoyed! :)

-Kayla


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